


It's the Little Things

by SnowyMay



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: AU, Domestic, Drabble, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Ghosting over past abuse, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Modern AU, Nightmares, non-magic au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-30
Updated: 2015-09-30
Packaged: 2018-04-24 04:11:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4905022
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SnowyMay/pseuds/SnowyMay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s all perfectly domestic...Except for when it isn’t.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's the Little Things

I make the coffee, James warms the muffins. He makes my chocolate ones warm and melty while his blueberry ones are never far from a tub of cream cheese. We sip down our respective cups, mine always changing and his with two tea spoons of sugar, as the sun creeps into our apartment. He always ends up rushing off to work while I can either return to bed or crack open my laptop.  
Often enough I choose the warmth and comfort of our bed, opting for a few more hours for sleep. Our cat wakes me when she needs my attention. James thinks it’s strange to take a cat for a walk but our little one loves it and who am I to deny her. I meet Lily on Saturday and Sunday, cat in tow, and we eat at the tiny café off Main Street that doesn’t care so long as I have my baby leased. When we return I work on whatever I’ve been assigned to write, and if I have the patience to I’ll add to my pet project. I’ll have managed dinner by the time he gets home and we eat, exchanging words about our day. I’ll tell him about meeting Lily for our daily tea outside of the park and he’ll tell me whatever antics his group managed after (and during) work. It’s all perfectly domestic.  
Except for when it isn’t.  
I still have nightmares. James holds me through them, his sleep deprived eyes the next morning telling me what his smile doesn’t. Some mornings, my voice apologizes, cracking and throat aching, I’m unable to get up. James will bring me soothing tea and cuddle me, if he can he’ll call off work. More than once I’ve screamed at him to leave me alone, to just leave. James only pulls me in close and kisses my forehead after I’ve let it all out and I beg for forgiveness. It’s times like that that I regret not leaving, not for myself, but for James.  
He’s perfect, and that’s why I tried to leave. I’d made a two lists-stay or leave. I’d struggled to figure out if James would be relieved not to have me anymore or sad that I’d disappeared. I’d told him over dinner and James had gotten mad, madder than I’d seen him in a long time. When he’d calmed down he told me it wasn’t my right to decide what was best for him, that he loved me and had every right to be in my life…That I had the right to be loved.   
I love him. Really do love him. More than Lily and our cat and pumpkin cheesecake put together. It still shocks me, that not only do I love him but that it’s reciprocated down to the basic instinct. That knowledge gets me though the hard days. James know how to treat me, not like a child but with enough coddling to know that I’m loved. I deny him nothing and he withholds nothing.   
Sometime I worry about us. I’m shattered beyond repair (James disagrees with me) and James has his own demons (But he’s still perfect). I’ve had dreams where we tear each other apart, both of us ripping each other apart. But James pulls me into his embrace and I manage to breathe enough to calm me. His warmth seeps into me and all I can do is breathe…blissfully breathe.

**Author's Note:**

> Just something I whipped together while ignoring the essay I need to write (Yay, something came for my procrastination!)


End file.
